Friday, December 19, 2014

What Does It Matter?


music moves me
the emotion, beat, and drums
it pounds through my soul
and in it, i've never felt so free.
Rhythm is a dancer,
and i am her partner.
she leads, and i follow.
not everyone sees her
but what does it matter if i do?

(she is still skinnier than me)

color splashes through my veins
and winds its way
into visions i see in simple things.
sparks. words. abstract.
the idea melds into a project
and when i open my eyes
there is something new on the canvas.
but what does it matter if this is what i see?

(she still has perfect vision over four-eyed me)

the waves in my mind leap and connect
in electric flashes, 
connecting and fluidly lighting the way
to a solution.
its elasticity has saved my life
time and time again.
but what does it matter how i think?

(her viewpoints are seen with more value over mine)

words have always been powerful
they can strike or stroke your heart into 
a fiery furnace of emotion.
they leave my fingertips,
spiraling into thought-laced bubbles
that pop and spew my thoughts
into your consciousness.
but what does it matter how i write?

(she even has prettier hands than me)

...

my waistline sags past the number

proclaimed to be appealing.
my hair lies dull and dark
a direct contrast to the world's desired shade.
the eyes that see art in everyday life
lie hidden behind a boring shade of dirt.

my physical features are explicitly
unextraordinary.
but what does it matter how i look?


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Wednesday, December 17, 2014

Got Me Good

Hello everyone!

So these photos were taken from last week when mom and I went to Boise for my orientation. She didn't go to the actual event, but she was my driving companion and helped me get these photos at least! It was an 8 hour long orientation (ugh), but it was well worth it. My classes are set for the spring, I've got financial aid figured out, and I got a little more familiar with the campus. Not to mention, I'm better acquainted with the city. I can already tell I'm going to enjoy living in Boise!

If anything, the pizza has won me over - Mom and I stopped into a place called Old Chicago while walking around downtown, and I have no regrets. See those snapshots of that cheesy goodness? It tasted even better. It had a lemon-garlic sauce that was divine, and with fresh spinach tossed in a lemon vinaigrette. How can something be so carby-cheesy delicious yet refreshing at the same time?

What's more is that I received some surprising, positive reinforcement, even for my one-day visit. I ran into a classmate from my Yoga class at the orientation, and we got to know each other better that day. Then while wandering campus on my own, I saw a familiar face. My old friend Marissa just so happened to be standing in my path, and we met in a hug and exclamations of delight. What are the chances? Even better is that we were discussing living situations and discovered we were going to be neighbors! The place she's staying at is literally a 1 minute walk from where I'll be living!

There are positive things at work here, and I'm even more excited about this scary move. It's still scary. But not as much as before.


Monday, December 15, 2014

Music Monday: Gypsy & the Cat

It is when I am in a complete daydream mode that I most appreciate Gypsy & the Cat's music. Ironically, they even go under the genre of indie/dream pop music. So, all the more perfect for daydreaming to! This is a group composed of two DJ's, Xavier Bacash and Lionel Towers.




Take a listen, and hope you have a dreamy Monday!

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Friday, December 12, 2014

Let's Get Real: Pop Quiz

Have you ever felt put on the spot? Someone casually asks you a question, yet underneath that question lies another intent that is reliant on whether you answer correctly or not.
You are being given a pop quiz, my friend, and how you respond is how you will be judged.

Now I don't mind being challenged. What bothers me is what the other person's attitude or intent may be. When it is an open-hearted discussion and we are honestly exchanging ideas or thoughts, I find that one of the most invigorating and enlightening type of conversations to have. But when it is done in a superior manner and everything I have to offer is all but completely disregarded, it frustrates me. Why are you asking for my opinion if you don't want to hear it?

I see this, not only in my own circles, but in others - all the time! Why are people looking for conflict? What's worse is when I'm put on the spot. At times, I can be clever and witty and quickly respond with a smart answer, but...

Okay, who am I kidding?
That only happens hours later when I'm lying in bed, replaying the conversation and thinking about what I should have said. 

What some people don't understand, is that while I'm quiet initially, it's because I'm absorbing what they're saying. I'll let their question or statement sit in my mind for hours, perhaps a day, a week, sometimes months before I can formulate a thorough answer or opinion. I'll imagine what I should've said and build on it until I can finally form my own opinion in a thorough statement. 

There are those who don't need to think that long, and can instantly come up with a response, and to those individuals, I envy you. Though I am wary of people who talk so easily and smoothly (I've learned the hard way those are often the types who talk a loud talk but rarely walk the walk), I cannot help but admire their ability. The only way I can even work through a thought is to write it out.

So here you go. I just wrote out my feelings on being pop quizzed.

How else do you think I find substance for these blog posts? ;)
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